Keep It Simple

My toaster died yesterday. This in itself would not normally be noteworthy enough for me to write about it. However this particular toaster achieved something no other toaster in my life had ever been able to do. This toaster made me smile.


Over the years i have owned many toasters. Two slice models, four slice models, some with bagel settings and some with extra wide slots. Many of those toasters even had "computer controlled settings" or advanced technology to make my toasting experience faster, easier and more enjoyable. A few of them were even designer labeled! They pretty much ALL sucked. Most of them only lasted a couple of years at the most and some even shit the bed within a few months. Now these were NOT cheap toasters. Several of them cost over a hundred bucks! Keep in mind that this was back in the day. "Back in the day" was the 1980's or 1990's when business was great, People had jobs working in factories. Folks with no money down and lots of credit card debt, could buy a $300,000 house with just a signature. Ahhhhh those were the days! It was until it all came crashing down. After 9/11 this country was never the same and that bubble we all enjoyed was about to burst.


Personally my life was about to burst also. For reasons I'll not get into here, my marriage went into a tail spin around 2001-2003 and i ended up divorced. The Ex ended up with the house and the fancy toaster. From what i gather this was pretty common back then. After years of doing well, reality is hard to deal with and many relationships came crashing down also.


So this brings me to my little dead toaster. When the dust settled from my marriage i needed stuff. I also did not have much money so i went to the local K-Mart at the time and bought a few essentials to get back on my feet. One of these was my little $7.00 K-Mart toaster. Now this toaster is as simple of a toaster as you can get. It's just a two slice model with a simple dial timer. All it does is toast, and nothing else. Not having allot of money, old Crusty survived on cereal and toast for along time. That little toaster was used EVERY DAY. Sometimes it was used two and three times a day!


The months and then the years went by and my life started to get better. I used to joke about my little toaster buddy.  When its fifth birthday came and went i was amazed it was still going strong. I decided that even though i could afford a better one by now, I was going to stick with this one and see how long it lasted no matter what. It was one of the few reliable things in my life that was always there for me. During that time i had relationships come and go, but that little piece of crap hung in there for me.

So now its 2010 and I'm re-married. My life is going much better and my cereal and toast diet over the last seven years has actually been beneficial to my health. But yesterday my seven year relationship with my reliable, old friend came to an end. That $7.00 little toaster lasted seven years! Can you believe that? I was smiling ear to ear and yet i was sad over the loss of a old friend. But life does go on.

So last night me and Mrs Crusty headed off to Wal-Mart for a new toaster. I talked all the way down the highway about my little toaster. I talked about how i have had more expensive and fancier models in my past life, but that my simple and cheap little friend stuck with me all those years. We get to Wal-Mart and look over the selection and would you believe that they actually have a simple, little toaster that sells for less then $7.00? HOLY SHIT, I paid $7.00 seven years ago and now you can buy one for $6.59! I was shocked but i never let Mrs Crusty know what i was thinking. Anyways, she picked up a pretty simple toaster that looked nice and asked me what i thought. My mind said go with the $6.59 model, but i could tell she wanted to go with the one that sold for $14.00. I just nodded my head and said i like that one too.